How I Learned to Stop Masking and Love Autism

I’m autistic. I wrote about my diagnosis a few times and in the last few days I’ve been finding some kind of joy in being autistic.

Autism Spectrum Disorder is something that I find rather interesting. It is something that definitely defines me as a person. However, throughout the years I masked my autism a lot, especially before transitioning.

I used to have a lot of special interests when I was a kid – from Sonic The Hedgehog and Invader Zim to production logos such as 20th Century Fox [1] or Windows boot screens. These interests were slowly vanishing as I got through adulthood mostly due to depression and they seem to be showing up again as I’m feeling way better.

As a teen, I used to feel very socially inadequate and awkward. Although I had strong suspicions about being autisic, I would think of myself as a broken person.

Post transition, I have embraced my weirdness. I’m weird, I’m awkward, I’m nerdy, quirky, those words define me a lot. And I can’t care more for what others think – I feel great being like this.

Of course, it takes ages to finally be in peace when you’re autistic, especially when you’ve been bullied and rejected so often. But when you finally learn how to be yourself, to be gentle with yourself and to respect your limits, you will definitely feel way better.

Take care!

[1] Thread about the 20th Century Fox logo